Wednesday, May 2, 2007

My sweetheart Casey


Casey is the sweetest boy. Ever. In the history of the world. There are a million reasons and examples I could give, but here is what touched me today...

Casey and I were reading a book we got out of the library called 'Bill In A China Shop'. It's about a bull who enters a china shop and spots the teacup of his dreams. He just can't leave the store without it, but sure enough - he IS a bull in a china shop and some unfortunate accidents occur. The clerk is snobby and rude and refuses to sell poor Bill the teacup he so fancies. Along with some writing about how upset Bill is, there is an illustration of Bill with tears brimming in his eyes. Well. I look down at Casey and the look on his face...he is big-eyed and sorrowful - he truly looks as if he's about to cry! He asked me, "Is da bull doing to get the teacup dat he loves?" and, "Why does the man teep saying dat?" because the store clerk kept saying, "A bull does not belong in a china shop". So I make some kind of chipper quip about how I was sure there was going to be a happy ending, I quickly flip the page and read on, hoping that something comes along to brighten my baby's blue skies!! Sure enough, a happy ending. Not only does Bill end up with his coveted and beloved teacup, but he comes away with three dear new friends to boot!
So I close the book and look down again at Casey. He is looking much relieved and appeased. I said, "You looked like you were getting a bit upset about Bill", and Casey said, "Yeah, I felt like I was doing to twy!". I asked him why he felt like he might cry, and he said because it was very sad. That boy has empathy. I mean, really!! And this is not the first time I've noticed it. It's always been there, and always been apparent. With me, with his sister, and now his brother - with other children anywhere - out on the playground, at preschool...whether he knows them or not, he has always been quick to run up to a child who's fallen down, or who's dropped her popsicle, and put his arm around them and say, 'it's otay!', or, 'are you awright?', or 'don't worry!'. Any time he's ever seen me cry or bothered by something, he comes over and hugs me and says, "I love you. You're a dood mommy". Whenever Cody starts to fuss, Casey goes to him and says in the sweetest, high, little sing-song way, "Tody!". And today, when Chanel was feeling upset and frustrated by her inability to get the hang of the high jump in P.E., Casey relayed an anecdote to her about something - I can't remember what (and oh how I wish I could!), and Chanel (in typical Chanel fashion) responded that what he said had nothing to do with anything, I pointed out to her that what Casey was doing was trying to make her feel better. And that's exactly what he was doing in his sweet, three year old way. He is deeply aware of others, and he amazes me with the depth and maturity with which he responds to other people's (or bulls!) feelings. I love that little guy. I get choked up just thinking about him and his sweetness. And you can be sure that were he to see me right now, he'd have his little hands on my leg and he'd look up into my face with his big, beautiful brown eyes and he'd say, "I love you. You're a dood mommy".

Saturday, April 14, 2007


Chanel at 11...(so far!)


  • Grade 6

  • Lifesong to Champlain again

  • pigtails

  • ears pierced

  • ice hockey

  • wearing Canucks and Penguins jerseys

  • Tae Kwon Do

  • IPod Nano

  • The Sims

  • MSN (dustbunnydog@hotmail.com)

I love you, little girl!!


Monday, April 2, 2007

Cody Baby




Well, Cody, you are 8 weeks old today! 8 weeks! Where has the time gone?! What have I been doing?! 8 weeks has just flown by...

You are so loved. By all of us. We all tell you that numerous times a day.

You are so cute!! Those big blue eyes...of my three babies, I think your eyes are the biggest!

The day after your 6 week mark, you smiled so big at Casey, and now you smile so big so readily...Both Chanel and I are so caught up in your smiles that we can't tear ourselves away - you hold us captive when you are smiling at us, and we will do anything for however long it takes just to keep you smiling.

I call you Mr. Pleasant. You just are. You are content and peaceful most of the time. So easygoing. And thank goodness, what with being my third child!! I couldn't ask for a better baby. I never thought that having three children could be so easy...

You are chubbing up and looking so big! You are quite often happy just lying on your blankets on the floor or sitting in your chair punching and kicking so enthusiastically. You are really working your little body and figuring it all out! And you are SO strong!! You hold your head up so well - and longer and stronger every day! And when I hold you up with your feet on my legs, you push yourself up into a standing position and hold your head up with your big blue eyes open so wide and bright...

I'm writing this at 12:18 am. Daddy has taken you to bed and I can't stand it any longer - just writing this about you makes me want to rush upstairs and scoop you up and kiss your sweet soft baby cheeks and breathe in your sweet baby breath...I'm signing off and I'm going to do just that!!

I love you, baby boy.

Mommy. xoxoxo


Monday, March 12, 2007

3 a.m. eternal

I started this blog so that I could capture all my deepest thoughts about life, etc. but the only time I seem to have deep thoughts is when I'm two stories away from my computer in the middle of the night, like around 3 a.m. or so...What I really need is a laptop that I can sleep with so that instead of scribbling on scrap paper in the dark, I can log on from my bed and get really profound. Last night's thoughts centered around memories of Powell River - specifically my grandparents' house - and then they spun off into wondering about what my children's significant memories of their childhood will be as adults, and then my mother's scrapbook and when did she put it together, anyways?! Last night - or more specifically, at about 3 a.m. this morning, it seemed REALLY important that I ask my mother about her scrapbook, but of course today I didn't get around to calling her. 3 a.m. is also a very wonderful time to get anxious about your children having not seen a dentist in a very long time, though again, there is never time the next day, or even the thought of it, to call a dentist to book an appointment. I wonder what tonights pressing issues will be...I THOUGHT THE DRUGS WERE SUPPOSED TO TAKE CARE OF THIS KIND OF THING?! (sigh...)

Friday, February 23, 2007

Blogging is dumb.

...or at least I used to think so. Like, who are you and who really cares about your musings?! And now here I am...so self-indulgent!! I never had any interest whatsoever in blogging myself, although I get a perverse thrill out of reading certain other people's!! No interest whatsoever, that is, until...until Cody was born. So, basically, for like...the past 19 days the thought's been growing on me! (I feel the need to justify this, or explain myself...humour me!) I find myself sitting up in the middle of the night, feeding Cody, or just watching him, and my brain kicks into gear...I start having all these thoughts about my life, my children, my husband, my family...my past, my present, and the future...and I start thinking that I should be keeping a journal - as an outlet for myself, as a reference for myself, and also as an archive perhaps for my children one day...so that they can know me and my thoughts for them and their lives - so that they can know what I thought of them, what I felt for them, and what my intentions were...(this is creepy - I'm talking about myself in the past tense!), and so that maybe they can know that I never meant for them to end up in therapy...(tee hee). Why not just write in a journal or a diary? Why blog?! Well, I do try to stay current. Plus, my hand with a pen cannot keep up with my brain, but two hands typing...I stand a better chance. I also like the idea of being able to illustrate my 'journal' in all those tekky kind of ways...once I figure out *how*, that is, or until I get Steve to do if for me! :) And then I can just print my blog, and make a journal out of the copies. Seems easier for this time-pressed mom. So why, you ask, did I invite you three (Steve, Hilary, Neil) to this blog? Well, cause I couldn't figure out how to bypass the 'invite a friend' option and still get my blog started :), plus - I wonder, if a blog falls in the forest and nobody hears it...Actually, I guess I'm hoping for the occasional feedback from you guys...plus, I usually end up blabbing about all my random thoughts to you all anyways - this might save us all a bit of time! And again, in regards to this blog being intended as a journal that I might want to pass along to my children someday, you three are crucial to my life as well as my children's lives, so any input or contribution you make would be valuable to them. And me. No pressure though! Don't feel like you HAVE to read this rambling, droning, grammatically incorrect document, or provide any kind of comments, etc...I'm not necessarily going to write TO my kids here...I'm not actually quite sure what I'm going to do here really, or where I'm going with this...I don't have a long-term or commited plan. I'm just trying this out. For those times when I wake up in the middle of the night and think I have something really important to say, or when I'm in the bathroom and some of my best thoughts come to me...or when I need to vent and I don't want to risk an actual encounter with a person...maybe that's when I'll find myself here. Boy, this really IS self-indulgent, isn't it?! So I think I'm done for now. Maybe I'll post again later today, maybe in a few days, maybe never again. Who knows?! Aaahh...I feel such artistic freedom...blogging really is therapeutic! :) Stay tuned...mwah hah hah!!!

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